MotherFucker

[sevendeadlyfun]

Here's a little trick question for all my quick-witted flisters:

When is another person's inappropriate behavior your fault?



When he's a married man hitting on you, of course. You can't expect a man to control his own cock, for pity's sake! When he pinches your ass, you're supposed to be mortally offended instead of tolerantly amused. If you're only amused, you're clearly an OMG HOR who doesn't respect his marriage. Nevermind that HE obviously doesn't respect his marriage. Not the fucking point, is it?

Your fault, after all, for having a pinchable ass. At least, that's what I was told. If you're an attractive woman and a married man hits on you, it's your fault and that's why his wife is treating you like shit. What do you expect, standing there being all amused and attractive and not offended? That he's going to behave like a responsible, married adult and keep his hands to himself?

NO! It's your job as a woman to behave in such way as to not tempt men. How dare you have a tongue ring IN PUBLIC! That's like begging for men to grope you.

And you can't blame his wife for not speaking up! She's intimidated by you and your ZOMG VISIBLE TATTOOS. You're just not "approachable" which apparently means fuck all plus who knows. If you were a real woman, you'd understand these things and stop insisting that people verbalize their boundaries. YOU should just KNOW their boundaries without being told. Not everyone can be all honest and shit. I mean, if they were, who would fulfill the dirty looks and whispers quota so vital for social exchanges?

Bitch.


Yes, this happened to me. Yes, the above writing is based on a conversation I had with a FRIEND who informed me that being reasonably attractive and personable was threatening. Also, not being offended by a man's juvenile ass pinch is "asking for it" and if I wasn't willing to change, I should just expect people to hate me. For, I suppose, cruelly forcing their husbands to grope me without my permission.

Comments

[lilithbint.livejournal.com]

O_o

well obviously you should have punched him in the face (to prove you are a feminist), called the cops (to show you were offended), burst into tears (to demonstrate your feminine side) and commiserated with his wife (to show your solidarity) and gone out in a full burka in the first place to avoid arousing uncontrollable male lust.

Some women are insane and would rather blame everyone else than themselves or their normally perfect husbands.

A fan at James' last convention is reported to have said she was going to grope him cause that was what he was there for...
and another so called fan justified her words by saying that women who dress provocatively also shouldn't be surprised if they are molested.

And we wonder why equality and sanity aren't as advanced as we expected.

[anxiety-junkie.livejournal.com]

Wow. I have to ask, what did the husband think about all of this? Was he aware of his wife's attitude?

Can I pinch your ass? Tattoos are sexy. And a tongue ring? C'mere, hot mamma. *g*

[raemcn.livejournal.com]

Dayum! Can I pinch? Can I lick some tat? Is that appropriate behavior? Gotta say you have to be one sexy chica.

If the hubby is acting this way it's no one's fault but his own. If he's doing it jokingly then there shouldn't be any problem at all. My husband's best friend jokes about how I'm going home with him all the time. It's a joke. He's pinched my ass before. I just blew it off as the joking around it was as did my hubby. He's never gone past that into the point of "too far". If this guy isn't just messing around then I'd say it's because he's an ass. If his wife sees it as not playing but serious then he should respect her feelings. If he's actually wanting a piece from you that's so not your fault and if his wife blames you for it then she's a fucking idiot who's putting up with someone who's probably cheated on her several times. She should be jumping on his ass or kicking him out of the house. NOT bothering you with his fucked up self!

I've always believed in wear what you want, especially if that's tattoos! Getting my new one in one week!

[jaded-jamie.livejournal.com]

I've never heard such horse shit in my entire life. We are responsible for our own actions and to say a man cant control himself is as insulting to men as it is to women. You should have slapped him hard and good.

[athenewolfe.livejournal.com]

hugs you tight - that is so insane but I have to say I have had people tell me that before as well. Growls

[sevendeadlyfun.livejournal.com]

And we wonder why equality and sanity aren't as advanced as we expected.

Yes. This. That's exactly how I feel. I didn't touch him, he touched me. Yet somehow this is my fault? I'm not normally all outraged gender politics huffy, but shit like this?

My outraged gender politics, let me show you them.

Thanks, sweetie. It helps, knowing that not all women are insane fuckwits.

[sevendeadlyfun.livejournal.com]

You may indeed pinch my ass. It is very pinchable.

And I'm not sure what anyone thought because no one was actually talking about it. It was all dirty looks and whispers and at some point, she must have yelled at him or he ran into a clue by four because he started hanging all over her instead of me.

Whatever. I'm not responsible for other people, but I am really sad that someone I thought was my friend has, to quote an episode of Coupling, "the sexual politics of a Viking attack".

[sevendeadlyfun.livejournal.com]

Yay for new tattoos! I have multiple tattoos and piercings, so I'm always up for a round of celebration over body adornment.

And I later found out that she had cheated on him while he was in Iraq. So I'm guessing I was his personal bludgeon against her. Yanno, the whole "I gotta freebie" attitude of adultery that seems incredibly common these days. Had I known that, I would have run screaming from these people before I even said hello.

But yes, I'm aggravated because I feel like I got the fuzzy end of the lollipop and I wasn't the one "misbehaving", as it were.

Love you, hon! Can't wait to see your new tattoo! :)

[sevendeadlyfun.livejournal.com]

GAH! I hate this. Why can't a woman be attractive and confident without OMG "asking for it"?

Stupid stupid double standards. I vote we kick some ass!

*loves you*

[anxiety-junkie.livejournal.com]

A clue by four. *snicker*

[kidcyclone.livejournal.com]

Believe it or not, people have claimed I was 'intimidating' too. In person apparently I'm scarier than online- hard to believe, I know!

I think it's probably because you're intelligent and have a lot of verbal skills, as well as having actual ideas. That apparently intimidates some people.

Personally, if Mr. Fantastic ever grabbed somebody's arse I'd be kicking his, not blaming the person who was grabbed, but some people are clearly idiots. And for the record I like large tattoos.

And I like you.

[rebcake.livejournal.com]

It is my curse in life to play devil's advocate, so here goes:

That poor woman has to live with the jerk. Why she'd want to is the real, true question here. However, if transferring blame is her coping mechanism, there ain't much you can do about it, sweetie. If you think you got a hard time by blowing it off, just imagine the reaction if you'd made it a big deal! It would've started with "You crazy bitch!" with perhaps a soupçon of "Lighten Up!" thrown in. Sigh. And she would've had to come to his defense, which would've been even more humiliating for her. Unless she's the kind of gal who can tell Casanova, "What d'ya expect, idiot?", which I doubt.

If the lady is someone you care about, lay it out for her. My personal suggestion would be, "I'm sorry he's embarrassing you like this." If she's not, well, now you have another reason why not.

In the "could be worse" category, for some gals it's a stepfather or Uncle Ernie, and just imagine having to relive the moment with Mom or Aunt Agnes. Gah!

[laazikaat.livejournal.com]

OMG! you went out in public without your Burka!? Tramp! I'm surprised you weren't mobbed by men. How could that poor male have been expected to control himself? Why weren't you decently covered from head to foot?

And you failed to swoon away in a faint when he touched you. I'm deeply shocked. Obviously you were just gagging for it. That poor man was a victim of your feminine wiles.

And I bet you weren't wearing your chastity belt either. No man was safe.