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Because participating in a DADT focus group has left me totally drained, I will toss off shame and post this here.

the that's my favorite! meme
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Pairing: Adelle/Topher

Rating: NC-17

Summary: She touches him with icy hands, her rough pinches and pokes abrading his already tender skin. There’s a certain excitement in these harsh preliminaries. Topher and Adelle - in a certain slant of light.

A/N: So, I went looking for Adelle/Topher D/s fic and fandom, I am disappoint. Where is the fucked up fic to match their OMG fucked up dynamic? Well, it's here. Un-beta'd because I don't know anyone who does Dollhouse and kinked out to heck and back. Feedback always welcome!

Doesn't matter what he calls hers - she owns him... )
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So, some of these are old - but I wanted an up to date icon post since I seem to be addicted to making Tudors icons. What can I say? I have a huge girlcrush on Anne Boleyn (historical and fictional).

For the record: this is what I did today, in between my son's MANY MANY OMG MANY doctor's appointments.

Anne Boleyn (and her King) )

Many Icons

Aug. 8th, 2010 09:22 pm
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It's what I've been doing lately. I have some I've done for [ profile] joss_by_episode, some for [ profile] fantas_magoria and a few Tudors icons I did just for me.

Icons. Icons. Also, icons. )
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Despite rumors to the contrary, I haven't actually abandoned sunny Naples for a coldwater flat in London. I've only thought about it.

Plus I have yet to really determine if the coldwater thing is a metaphor or not. And also, why are bathrooms extra in London hotels? I've been making plans for a mini-holiday in London and all the hotels charge extra for a bathroom. I need an explanations.

Still working on Spanky's remix. It's hard. She's so darn awesome I'm intimidated and it's killing my creativity. So I'm working on a D/s Adelle/Topher pegging/masturbation fic to clear my head. And that is a helluva lotta slashes up in there.

In other news, my Handsome Husband is in Afghanistan with NATO for the next six months. He told me he got to say hi to General Petraeus in the hall the other day. I'm suddenly not at all worried about his safety, yanno?

The Monster is OMG sick. He's had an ear infection for the past month, he's on two types of antibiotics plus codeine for the pain. Yeah. We'll be addressing that next week. There may be sarcasm and threats involved.

Oh, and I got into grad school! I'm going for my MSW (Master's of Social Work) at the University of New England. Totally online, even. I luff the internet.

I was a bit nervous about the whole grad school thing. I had to write a personal statement and I was really concerned. I mean - if I didn't get in, it would basically be because they rejected my entire life. My whole life wouldn't have made the cut. How...mortifying. But apparently my life made the grade and I start back to school August 30.
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1. OMG - Joss Whedon only knows like 15 people. Faith, Fred (doing a mighty Illyria impression in later shows), Wesley, Penny - will no one else take this man's calls?

2. The substitute Angel kills me. All the brood and 50% fewer facial expressions? JOSS. ILU. STOP THE MADNESS. Grab hold of the well-rounded hero character and roll with it. I'm begging.

3. I have the slightest teensy weensiest barely worth mentioning crush on Topher and by that I mean I want him to bear my geeky genius babies. Also - if there is not at least one community dedicated to Topher/Adelle 'cesty roleplay fics, I do not know fanpeoples. That wasn't even subtext - Joss just wrote that sick puppy right into the dialogue.

Fan baiting is never nice. Except when it really, really is.

4. I get it already. Military-industrial complex = bad. The horse died. The beatings can now stop. Find a new issue.

4, cont. Except not the serious Daddy issues you clearly already have. Boyd? The Boyd thing? Not even right. Just not. At all.

5. I just finished this afternoon. Re-watch commencing...about now.
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Pairing: Henry, Anne Boleyn, Henry/Anne Boleyn

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Her name escapes his lips, a pleading for both her love and her mercy. Shortly before Henry's death, his sins (and wives) return to haunt him.

Disclaimer: This a work of fiction based on the Showtime series The Tudors. I have no rights to the characters as they are portrayed, but then honestly I'm not sure Showtime does, either. In any case, this is not based on the historical lives of King Henry VIII or Queen Anne Boleyn but on the fictional characters and events from the series. Historical accuracy certainly not guaranteed.

A/N: Because I watched the series finale and couldn't bear the ridiculousness of Anne's return, I rewrote it to suit myself. Spoilers for Season 4, Episode 10 of The Tudors.

You are not as I left you, she observes drily... )
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Characters: Spike

Rating: PG-13

Summary: He’s got a basket full of kittens, an office full of novice poker players, and a source that might have some information on Angel. What Spike's doing while Angel is missing. Spoilers for the comics up to issue #32.

A/N: Posted for prompt #25-poker on my [ profile] 50ficlets table. And for [ profile] anxiety_junkie who suggested Spike and his kittens. I didn't make it all the way to the actual game, but I hope you'll like anyways.

Feel free to suggest pairings or ideas for the other 48 prompts!

Time to distract the kiddies, then... )
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Characters: Angel, Wesley, Spike

Rating: R

Summary: Even knowing the fall never really happened, he still looks for Wesley’s ghost. Even after he makes his escape, Angel's never really free.

A/N: A bit of an oblique follow-on from my remix Moving On (The Everything Old is New Again Remix) for my bestest beta [ profile] anxiety_junkie who asked for Angel/Wes. I hope this gets at least close and thanks so much for all you've done for me over the years!

Posted for prompt #36-memory on my [ profile] 50ficlets table. Feel free to suggest pairings or ideas for the other 49 prompts!

He can hear Spike pacing in the hallway... )
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I'm probably one of the more vocal remixers. When I read other remixers journals during remix, they don't bitch nearly as much as I do about the process. I can't tell if they're really cool or if I'm way overdramatic.

I suspect it may be a bit both.

My remix angst, remixed )
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Characters: Angel, mentions of Angel(us)/Darla & the Fanged Four

Rating: R

Summary: Even the dead have to move on. A small box, a trapped vampire, and a few lifetime's worth of memories - good and bad.

A/N: Remixes have gone live, so here's mine! Thanks to [ profile] anxiety_junkie for all her hard work and dedication. Spoilers for Angel comics up to issue #31

Original Story: A Painful Birth by [ profile] brutti_ma_buoni

He tries not to sleep. Not that he's afraid of missing much... )

Remix Recs

May. 24th, 2010 07:20 am
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The remix archive went live last night. Since they've move it over to AO3, I wasn't sure how many of my flisties were persuing the awesome fics that came out of this remix. So here are at least two remixes that I enjoyed readaing.

Naked (The Wishing You Were Here Remix) is a Dawn-centric remix of my story Segue, a Xander/Dawn comics canon fic based on the prompt of awkward sex. What's most interesting to me is how the writer transferred the feelings of awkwardness from Xander to Dawn. Rather than the cool, collected take-charge Dawn that I wrote, this Dawn is nervous, almost anxious, about Xander's feelings for her and it makes their fumbling relationship even more endearing, if that's possible. My story was emphatically Xander-centric and I love this perspective change.

The second one that I really enjoyed was Taken Over (Stunned Silent Remix), a remix of [ profile] liz_marcs story All Yours. It's a powerful, painful look at the inside of Faith's head, during her stay in Buffy's body. The story encapsulates Faith's sexual and personal self-loathing, exposing her character in some very raw and real ways. I didn't write it (in case you're wondering) but I love it like a thing that is loved.

As always, leave some love the great (if currently anonymous) remix authors in our fandom if you go over. And if you can guess which one I wrote (and you aren't [ profile] anxiety_junkie who has a story in the works just for her anyways), I'll be happy to write you a little something based on pairing and prompt.

And even if you don't guess, my remix will be posted over here after the big reveal. But, until then, go! Read! Comment!
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Pairing: Spike/Xander

Rating: NC-17

Summary: Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. After Buffy dies, grief and a kind of madness take Spike and Xander places they aren't sure they can bear to go.

A/N: Written for prompt #7-nature vs. nurture-on my [ profile] psych_30 table. This was definitely a hard one to illustrate while still keeping (somewhat) plot relevant. Hopefully I haven't strayed too far on either count. And thanks so much to everyone who has kept reading this story, despite my sadly slow updates.

Previous chapters can be found in reverse order in my tags or start from the beginning.

He’s a monster in man’s clothing... )

Chapter 20
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I am dizzy and sneezy and several other Disney dwarves of ill-repute and little reputation. Also, I am not going back to work until June. Apparently I need to participate in some form of "retraining" or whatever and that's not scheduled until June 2. I would be aggravated except I was already planning on cutting back my hours to something less like a job and more like a hobby. Also I applied for a paying job, so hopefully I'll get that and it won't be an issue.

It's just part-time but it'll bring in some much needed PAID experience in the "human services" field. And if I get in to grad school, the part-time parts means I'll theoretically have enough time left over to intern somewhere. Not sure where, given that this is Naples and social work internships are not exactly thick on the ground, but somewhere. It's almost touching, isn't it, this pitiful faith I have that stuff will just work out.

Also also, my fingers are refusing to fing. I have re-typed a good half of this post already because I keep hitting the wrong keys. THIS COULD BE THE END, CAMPERS! SEND DELICIOUS TEAS AND ANNE BOLEYN BIOGRAPHIES.

Wait, I already have those. I also have a bizarre desire to write Tudors fic, which I'm hoping will go away if I ignore it for long enough. I had an "Anne's last letter to Elizabeth which she receives from her mother's confessor after her own coronation" idea and "Lady Rochford's ghost on the eve of her execution" fic idea. Plus a few more art ideas.

I may write the Lady Rochford one, if only because it's so damn angsty and exactly right for my idiom. But I refuse to do the Anne letter one because I'm not sure I could do it justice and also it would suck away any remaining will I have to write my damn admissions essay.

I am not currently writing my admissions essay. I have a page done and a fic to write for [ profile] anxiety_junkie which I have not forgotten about. Only slightly delayed in order that I might be unable to type coherently.

So, does anyone else have fanfic urges they're ignoring? I cannot be the only one.
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So, you guys remember how I posted really late last night? And I talked about how I had all these ideas for stories and art and also a graduate school admission essay? I mentioned Ashes and an post-return after the fall ficlet (for the table I took FOREVER AGO OMG) and some art for [ profile] fantas_magoria and [ profile] still_grrr.


I didn't get to any of that.

I did Tudor crossover icons instead... )

I swear, I'll get back to work and stop goofing off any second now!


May. 12th, 2010 12:48 am
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Do you ever have one of those nights where you can't sleep and you have a million different things you could (and should) be using this "free" insomniac time on but you just can't because while you're not tired enough to sleep, you're too damn tired to actually do anything?

Yeah, I'm there.

I cannot recommend enough The Ask by Sam Lipsyte. I'm reading it to my husband because I am determined to bring back reading aloud as a leisure time activity. I have fond memories of my favorite stories as a child being full of people reading aloud: Ma Ingalls, the Marches, various characters in Dickens and Austen. Plus I like reading out loud. I get to be all dramatic and the center of attention.

Anyways, the novel is based on the premise: How will Generation X have a midlife crisis when they've completely refused to grow up? For an incredibly funny (and ohmygod on target) summary of both the both and the question, read A.O Scott's review in the NY Times. As he puts it I see you rolling your eyes. That’s right, you: the one in the fake-vintage rock ’n’ roll T-shirt and thick-framed glasses reading this on an iPhone at the sidelines of your daughter’s soccer game. But you know exactly what I’m talking about, pal. (And by the way: stop trying to be a hip alterna-sports dad. Just cheer, for God’s sake.) TRUER WORDS, MY FRIENDS. TRUER WORDS. Also, when I read that, I was on my iPod Touch so there was a whole guilty blush alterna-sports Mom moment that I'd like to gloss over thankyouverymuch.

But trust me - it is exactly the sort of sardonic the world is fucked and I feel fine bitter is the new black story you'd expect. It's Daria gone south for grown-ups. It's...oh, just read it.

Still plugging valiantly away on the next chapter of Ashes. I'm a whole, WOW, four sentences in. It's like I don't even know what I'm doing. And I don't, so I remain spot on there.

Got a kernel of an idea for my first [ profile] 50ficlets idea from [ profile] anxiety_junkie. I could be writing that, but it sounds like work. However, as a preview, it's an Angel thinking about Ghostie!Wes post-return from the Fall. Yeah, that's almost the whole story right there, innit? Also I have several art ideas for [ profile] fantas_magoria and [ profile] still_grrr but those also come suspiciously close to effort.

Well, back to sitting around doing not much and waiting to become exhausted.
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So, the remix is done and posted. Except for maybe a bit of post-beta fiddling I did which was only the inserting a few words to make a sentence flow better and I should know better but I don't and UGH! I can't handle this kind of pressure, okay? Also I can't wait for next year. This one didn't give me enough good angsting time (despite what [ profile] anxiety_junkie will tell you, I hardly angsted AT ALL. Three emails is barely any angst in my book. So there.)

I'm back to grinding away at all my regular fic. I have the next chapter of Ashes open and I'm scribbling away. And by scribbling away, I mean, of course, that I occasionally will type out a sentence fragment or two, both of which I will rewrite two days from now and then erase in a week after having left the thing up on my desktop that long hoping something will come to me. So probably another month for that, unless I get struck by lightening naked James Marsters inspiration.

The Monster is recovering sort of nicely from his tonsillectomy. Still croaky and sore, but no major issues so far. His mother is not recovering so nicely. I am stuck at home inside while he recovers and IT IS KILLING ME, YA'LL. My perspective is so skewed by less than a week as a shut-in I was seriously contemplating buying a pair of snakeskin platforms. With 5 inch heels. SEND HELP (and some hot River/Doctor/Amy porn).

I'm anxiously awaiting the arrival of my latest few comics issues so I can see what everyone finds so objectionable. It's nice to see some stirrings on the comics side of the fandom (even if they are mostly negative). Now where's all the comics fic hanging out? I can't ever find any, apart from some very tentative Buffy/Satsu. I feel like I'm the only writer doing comics fic (which I know is patently untrue but it sounds appropriately dramatic).

Update me, flisties? Everyone ready for....ya know, that big upcoming thing? SIGH. It's the solitude. It's unhinging me.
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So, remember how last year I was all OMG I AM REMIXING AN EPICLY EPIC EPIC AND HOW AM I GOING TO CONDENSE A BAJILLION WORDS INTO A WORKABLE STORY OF LESS THAN THAT? Yeah, I don't have that problem this year. See? I learn from my mistakes.

AND GO ON TO MAKE TOTALLY NEW AND ORIGINAL ONES. The only story I could find that appealed to me because I'm a picky between 300 and 400 words. From that, I have to make a story of NOT LESS than 1000 words. Yeah. New and interesting times. Remind me of this part next year, yes? Not more than eleventy hundred words and not less than, oh, say, 500. Promise?

A procrastinatory poem, written while at the library today )
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1. I got my remix assignment. Oy. This could go awesome or crash and burn. Business as usual than!

2. I am super effing busy at work. Somehow the Director has got it into her head that I should be her unpaid personal assistant. This is yay! because it increases my chances of landing an actual paid position there and/or my chances of doing my social work internship there. However, this is BOO! because I am not fucking paid and dealing with her is a job.

3. REMIXOMG --- [ profile] anxiety_junkie, hold me!

4. Also, I'm not interested in being an administrative assistant. Yes, I'm good at it. I'm good at most things. Doesn't mean I'm interested in them.

5. My son is cleaning the litter box (Ed.- Oh yeah, we got a cat. We. WE. Ha! THEY got a cat. A cat who, naturally, adores me. NATURALLY.) and he just called in to the house to inform us that he knows why the litter box smells. It's all the big chunks of poo.

I am laughing so hard I'm crying.

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Pairing: Faith/Object

Rating: NC-17

Summary: Faith sneaks in to Buffy's room and makes herself very comfortable.

A/N: Incorporates the [ profile] kink_bingo prompt object penetration (objects not designed for sex). Thanks to my beta [ profile] anxiety_junkie for her hard work.

Buffy won't be back all weekend... )


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